Trading Your Tears Of Sadness In For Tears Of Joy

Life has its ups and downs and unless you have been living in a bubble or in denial you know this by now. Marriage also has its share of ups and downs. Unfortunately for way to many couples there are more bad days than good. This should not and cannot be the case. If your heart has been broken and you are constantly frustrated and find yourself wiping away tears, you need to fix things now before it's too late.

The question becomes how do you turn things around and bring back the laughter and loving thoughts and feelings? The second question is how do you get your spouse to change and help transform the relationship? A good place to start is by looking within and changing some things that you have control over.

The good news is that you have a great deal of control over what brings you joy and peace. The challenge is making a consistent conscious decision to focus on the things that matter and taking the long term approach. You need to understand what your long term goals are and spend your time and energy on achieving those goals. For example;

IF THE GOAL IS TO HAVE A LOVING AND PEACEFUL RELATIONSHIP;

* Don't get into senseless fights

* Give your spouse a pass when he or she blows it on unimportant matters

* Learn to laugh instead of nag

* Choose wisely your issues to fight about

* Be clear and consistent with the messages you give to your spouse

* Be humble and not afraid to say that your are sorry

* Don't do unto your spouse as it is done unto you

* Do treat your spouse how you want to be treated

IF YOUR GOAL IS TO HAVE MORE ROMANCE IN YOUR MARRIAGE;

* Don't stop trying to be romantic just because your spouse isn't

* Make sure that you work on removing the barriers to romance before trying to re-kindle the romance

* Take small steps and don't set unrealistic expectations

* Do have some expectations and let spontaneity and creativity rule the day

THE KEY TO REPLACING THOSE TEARS OF SORROW WITH TEARS OF JOY IS BY UNDERSTANDING A FEW BASIC PRINCIPLES;

* You can't change your spouse but by changing yourself your spouse may come along side of you and join the revolution

* You must understand where you are on your marital journey and also understand where you want to be in 30, 60, 90 or 365 days

* Your communication and execution will ultimately determine the success of your marriage

I hope and pray that your tears are soon mostly joyous ones. Marriage is difficult at times but there is no reason why you can't have a successful marriage. No marriage is perfect but that's no reason why you shouldn't be at peace and enjoying it. I wish you all the best and God bless

Credit: mark-rayan-pua.blogspot.com