In my last video I spoke about New Years resolutions and goal setting in general
Now !
Today's Tip is about hidden benefits..
Now by that I don't mean the sort of hidden benefits that the central banks are dishing out to each other.
It's more subtle than that.
Let's jump right in and take a look
When I'm working with a team or an individual and they are not getting the results or the changes they say they want
I always ask them this question. it's a little bit unusual
"What are the benefits of NOT achieving this?"
It could be that
- They didn't have to do what they say they will do
- They aren't held accountable
- They get to moan about how terrible things are
- They get to stay in what is comfortable & familiar
-It may be that they get a sympathetic ear from other people about their "struggle"
These are all 'hidden benefits' that they would have to find other ways to get if they achieved their goal.
There are always hidden benefits
In almost any situation, there will be hidden benefits. If these benefits are uncovered, you can find other ways to satisfy them AND achieve your goals more easily.
However, if you are not aware of the hidden benefits of a situation, it can make it more of a struggle to change. So, with regard to a current goal you wish to achieve or change you wish to make...
Ask yourself "WHAT ARE THE BENEFITS OF NOT DOING THIS?"
and pay attention to your answers.
You can look for other hidden benefits by asking
"WHAT AM I GETTING FROM THE CURRENT SITUATION?"
The answers you give yourself about these questions may seem a bit strange or perhaps even embarrassing, but once you've identified them, you can begin to find new ways to still get these hidden benefits AND achieve your goal.
Every benefit addresses a need or want
A benefit is only a benefit if it addresses a need or want, so the next step is to identify the needs or wants that the hidden benefit is supplying.
You can ask "WHAT IS THE NEED OR WANT THAT THIS BENEFIT IS SATISFYING?"
Anthony Robbins talks about six basic human needs, so if you're having trouble identifying the need or want, check this list for inspiration. Robbins' six are paraphrased as follows:
- Love & connection to other people
- Contribution to something bigger such as your family or community. A cause that you are passionate about
- Predictability, familiarity & security
- Unpredictability & surprise
- Growth & learning. Personal development.
- A sense of importance
One of the presuppositions of NLP is that every behaviour has a positive intention.
Now The presuppositions of NLP are not necessarily true, but it is useful to act as if they are true in certain situations.
It can be very freeing to realise that there has been a positive intention behind something you have been perceiving as "failure" or 'bad' or 'wrong'.
Once you know which needs or wants you've been satisfying, you can dream up many more even better ways to feel satisfied in the future.
So imagine what it will be like to ask yourself
"HOW CAN I STILL GET THESE BENEFITS WHILE I'M ACHIEVING MY GOAL?"
And then ask yourself that question.
The odds are that once you start to contemplate new ways of doing things, you'll often come up with even more ways of getting those benefits than the ones you currently have.
Sometimes people will say that there is no benefit in the current situation.
NOW, If that happens, check how long things have been the way they are. If it's more than a few weeks, then the hidden benefits should be familiar.
AndWith regard to not getting your goal...
Ask "WHAT ARE THE BENEFITS OF NOT ACHIEVING THIS?"
to identify hidden benefits of the current situation.
Ask "WHAT IS THE NEED OR WANT THAT THIS BENEFIT IS SATISFYING?"
Ask "HOW CAN I GET THIS BENEFIT WHILE I'M ACHIEVING MY GOAL?"
to identify better ways of satisfying the wants & needs.
Remember to use your imagination - there's always another way of meeting your wants and needs.
Read more Nlp Tips # 2-The hidden benefits of NOT Getting Your Goals
Nlp Tips # 2-The hidden benefits of NOT Getting Your Goals is a post from: NLP SKILLS
Credit: anita-pickup.blogspot.com
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